Retardation: A Celebration! & Patty Hearst!

Posted on April 7, 2008 by briteyellowgun

I got nuthin’.  Seriously, I just don’t feel like putting anything up on here today.  Sorry.  Besides, my internet connection is really acting up this afternoon and I just know if I put some time and effort into entertaining all of you with my beauty and retardation, I’ll lose the post when I go to upload it.  Oh, alright…if you’re going to harp on me about it, I’ll do an abridged post.

Big Tex, your comment on my last post made me laugh! 

Went for a long bike ride with the kids yesterday.  Pathetically out of shape.  Came home and promptly fell asleep on the couch.

At one of the playgrounds we stopped at yesterday, I heard someone angrily ask a kid there, “Are you retarded?”  I giggled a little bit to myself.

Went into work at 4 a.m. again today.  I’m soooo tired!  Oh!!!  I have decided to become the Patty Hearst of Auschwitz right down to having Stockholm Syndrome.  I spent much of the day eagerly and happily talking up the company and my role in it to co-workers who all, once more, thought I was insane.  I’m tossing around the idea of writing a screenplay based on my employment there…how I was taken against my will, held in a windowless cubicle and chained with leg irons to my chair.  But then how I saw the light and realized that Auschwitz is Beauty…that the death of dreams and careers isn’t all that bad!  That working for The Man and furthering the advance of Corporate America is my destiny in life!  I love my job!

I’m really into my new, re-discovered American idol, Patty Hearst, lately.  I loved her back in the seventies when she was kidnapped and I remember thinking she seemed so cool in that police car when they caught her, flashing her fist in support of the S.L.A.  Good times…good times.  When we were kids, we would stand on the edge of our pool and do SLA “cheers” and then jump into the pool in unison.  We were retarded though so that might have something to do with it.  Or we were just ahead of our time.  Or maybe just retarded. 

Filed under: Sunshiny Goodness

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8 Responses to “Retardation: A Celebration! & Patty Hearst!”

  1. heartinhand, on April 7th, 2008 at 3:33 pm Said:

    I still have the photo of the “lady” you work with. When I’m feeling ugly or lonely or depressed, I gaze at it and laugh thinking “At least I’m not her!”

    My! That comment sure shows an ugly side of me, doesn’t it?

    The sun is shining here RIGHT NOW! Finally! (It probably won’t be here long so I am going to go vacuum all the dust balls that the sunbeams are drawing attention to. *Hugs*

  2. Sage, on April 7th, 2008 at 3:49 pm Said:

    I never got into the Patty Hearst thing, you make me feel like I have missed something. Dammit

  3. Always reads , but rarely comments, on April 7th, 2008 at 4:23 pm Said:

    I fixated on patty Hearst back in the day when they were calling her by another name ( Tanya ).

    I even brought the newspaper clipping to school to talk about during show and tell , I was a sick retard in elementary .. Remember that beret she wore , how stylish .

    But I have to say I have had it up to here with gun toting crazy people in this country , yesterday , get this Chicago had it’s 23 Public School student killed by violence this year , and to think Schools not even out yet . Is it me or is it getting crazier by the minute in this world ?

  4. Big Tex, on April 7th, 2008 at 7:45 pm Said:

    Thank you BYG. :-) As far as Patty Hearst is concerned, my memories of her are pretty much limited to cheesy made-for-TV movies that are probably getting heavy rotation on Lifetime. I do think the picture of her with the gun was pretty cool, though. And the 7-headed cobra logo also rocked. Not sure why they weren’t able to turn all that great PR into at least a sitcom - I mean, if Pink Lady and Jeff could get a full hour, surely you could get at least a half-hour for a show with a beautiful machine-gun-toting debutante and a Krofft puppet snake with 7 heads? Think “The A-Team” meets “H.R. Pufnstuf.”

    Oh my christ child! You are hilarious! Pink Lady…a “Sunshine Day” favorite!!! Kiss in the Dark! As for that Patty Hearst sitcom, well, that will be my story when I write it.

  5. pissy, on April 7th, 2008 at 10:21 pm Said:

    I remember being fascinated by Patty Hearst back in the day.

    She knew how to work a beret.

  6. jackie, on April 7th, 2008 at 10:45 pm Said:

    see kev…it runs in the family…big tex is my 2nd cousin..his mom was like my sister…it’s that weird roycroft blood…

  7. javabear, on April 8th, 2008 at 12:23 am Said:

    I like the way you’re playing Auschwitz now. Good ploy. Turn that one into a sitcom.
    I heard that Patty Hearst was kidnapped, the poor girl! I was so upset. She was gone for a long time. Then all of a sudden she was one of the bad guys. I was confused. I still have no idea who the Symbionese are.

  8. Big Tex, on April 8th, 2008 at 4:58 pm Said:

    I have to agree with Jackie about the Roycroft blood - hers is more distilled, so you get a bigger dose of it. :-) Regarding the Patty Hearst, as long as the CW is out there, there’s always hope of getting it on the air.

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